Fancy this...

Why do people ask the most benign and infuriating questions? Like:

1. When are you buying a house?

Hey, it's not like I'm squatting! I already have a house, hello! If you mean with Arnie, well, we're still saving aren't we? We don't want to jump into something that we're not completely prepared for - duh!

2. When are you having kids?

Arnie and I just announced our engagement a few months ago. Skip the wedding, why don't you? I'm only 27! It's not like my eggs are about to dry up, for crying out loud!

3. Why are you spending so much on clothes/shoes/etc?

It's my money, damn it! Start complaining if I use YOUR moolah!

4. How come you're with an older guy?

Funnily enough, there are still some people who ask me this. My answer? Because I like mature men who are responsible and know what they want in life. I like their confidence and understanding of what life really is about - not just lying around and getting themselves laid.

5. Are you sure about marrying Arnie?

Hey, wise guy... if I weren't sure I wouldn't be with him for five years now, wouldn't I? And don't give me the whole "I don't know what I'm doing" crap. I have had a bad relationship and have had experiences the shittiest things so I KNOW if I'm being taken for a ride or not!

6. You are so open about sex. Does that mean you have a lot of experience?

This came from some reader who turned out to be a complete bastard and started spamming my blog. My original answer to this idiot was "it's amazing what reading a book could do for you." I'm open about sex? It's just called maturity, honey. If you're able to talk about it without giggling like some teenager, then you're past that stage of complete banality.

7. You seem harsh towards stupid people. Why is that?

I have unfortunately been surrounded by them for most of my life and have been very tolerant. I think I am entitled to choose the people I want to surround myself with now that I am much older. I do not have to try and impress anyone now and be Miss Popularity.
Happy now?